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like me?

Whatever your religious flavor, I wish it was just a holiday celebrated with family, friends, feasting, reflection (and perhaps football for you guys) rather than all the frenzied shopping and expectations and materialism. Just saying. I'm just kind of dreading this one.

I hear you big time, Gypsy! My wife and my siblings and I were all dreading the shopping so much that we decided to forgo the usual gift exchange and take the money we'd usually spend and make a group donation to a music school in Rocheter, NY in memory of our father who died in 2002. Of course, that does not apply to the nieces and nephews, but that usually only involves the checkbook.

I hate that too. I decided a long time ago I was not going to participate to, seemingly, the extent the rest of the world does it. My wife and I went out Saturday and did some geo-caching in a couple of small local parks. They were deserted! Everybody was at Target!...

The shopping experience wouldn't be so bad if people were nicer, but you run into some very sad and angry folks out there in the stores at Christmas time. I just don't get it, so most of my family knows I don't give too many gifts at Christmas. I try to save that for other times throughout the year.

Christmas has become another time to get together as a family and eat a nice meal and enjoy seeing family on a relaxed day off work.

Oh! i DO like the lights...and candles, etc. so often, after decorating we just sit around and watch the candles and lights with a cup of something warm to drink.

Ironic that a holiday marking the birth of Christ in circumstances of poverty is celebrated with a frenzy of materialism. Of course, we can hardly use the word "Christmas" anymore.

So what's the point America?

I have been doing holiday shopping online since 1998. Malls make me crazy.

Our collection of nephews and nieces grew so large that we instituted single child pollyanna for about 10 years.

My son is 13, and the Santa effect is gone. He makes a list, and I have to find the stuff.

This year, my brothers and sisters are skipping this, and we are using the pollyanna fund to provide a Merry Christmas for a family in need.

Since I am the fattest one, I am lobbying to dress up like Santa Claus and deliver the goods.... on my bike...dressed up in lights.

Santa does ride a beemer, y'know.

sjbmw wrote:Our collection of nephews and nieces grew so large that we instituted single child pollyanna for about 10 years.

What is single child pollyanna?

I've been boycotting Christmas the past couple years. I'm sick of the materialism, and the fact is that without little kids in the family it's sort of pointless. My oldest brother is the only one with kids, and with two divorces the kids keep getting further and further from the family, and forced get togethers become torture for all involved. My mom really gets into the spirit with trees and decorating, and loves buying gifts for everyone, but I'd much rather see the money she spends go to charity.

I much prefer getting together with the family on Thanksgiving.

GypsyRR wrote:

sjbmw wrote:Our collection of nephews and nieces grew so large that we instituted single child pollyanna for about 10 years.

What is single child pollyanna?

Put names in a hat and buy one gift, as opposed to each of us buying 10 gifts. The numbers worked out for a while but now I am a great uncle several times. Kids in my family got it pretty good at Christmas, I like the idea of getting gifts for a family that is having a less luck than I. It's going to put the spirit back in the holidays for me.

sjbmw wrote:

GypsyRR wrote:

sjbmw wrote:Our collection of nephews and nieces grew so large that we instituted single child pollyanna for about 10 years.

What is single child pollyanna?

Put names in a hat and buy one gift, as opposed to each of us buying 10 gifts. The numbers worked out for a while but now I am a great uncle several times. Kids in my family got it pretty good at Christmas, I like the idea of getting gifts for a family that is having a less luck than I. It's going to put the spirit back in the holidays for me.

We do that, too.

Also, both my church and my employer have programs to donate gifts to needy kids.

GypsyRR wrote:like me?

Whatever your religious flavor, I wish it was just a holiday celebrated with family, friends, feasting, reflection (and perhaps football for you guys) rather than all the frenzied shopping and expectations and materialism. Just saying. I'm just kind of dreading this one.

I couldn't agree with you more. I have asked my family for years to just donate money to the charity of choice instead of buying me gifts, but it never happens.

I'm also dreading seeing the distant family members and their spouses that I've had the same meaningless conversations with year after year. The same fake questions and jokes......
Watching the same people get drunk and loud gets old, along with the same brat kids running around out of control, with the parents yelling from across the room instead of controlling their jerk kids.

Maybe this year I'll give myself the gift of not going to the"big" family Christmas Eve event.........



*end of rant*

Yeah, donating is the way to go. There is this one family I know who donate to Samaritans Purse in my honor (I really don't have any honor, but they seem to like me) and then I get a letter telling me how many prosthesis' were donated in my name. That's pretty cool, because while I read the letter, I can imagine the added freedom those people must enjoy because of a new leg, or arm or whatever. Those are better thoughts than the ones that run through my mind on the way to my brother's or sister's house to gather with family.

I just came back from a family funeral a couple of weeks ago, and honestly, even though it was a funeral; it was still better to gather with family in that situation rather than to just gather for "stuff" or tradition. At least at the funeral there was genuine and honest emotions rather than the pretention and facades that often accompany family gatherings or office parties at Christmas.

I'm not necessarily done with my rant yet. How many more days to Christmas? I've got that many more left in me - but I'll try to tame it.

GypsyRR wrote:
I'm not necessarily don't with my rant yet. How many more days to Christmas? I've got that many more left in me - but I'll try to tame it.

I'm sure this thread will be a good place to rant before AND after the holidays......

I understand the distaste for the commercialization of Christmas.

I do enjoy seeing the kids' excitement. I usually buy myself whatever gadgets I want during the year, so I don't expect to get much at Christmas (and I am not disappointed ).

Ditto to all of you. Since my parents have died along with all the Aunts and Uncles and most of the rest of the family, most of the togatherness is gone. We, my SO and I ,go to my sister. This is great and the time togather is enjoyed. But, we live relatively close and visit often anyway. Her kids are grown and in college ,also nearby, and usually are doing their own thing and visiting friends reguardless of the holiday. My poor sis works her tail off getting C-Mas for a everyone and is usually pooped out and is dragging her tail all day. The day would probably be a wash except that we visit cousins on C-Mas night. We see them this one day a year briefly, a couple of hours, before returning home to resume our daily routines. I am not complaining , for one day this tradition will fade away and I know I will miss it.

I think that, for some, the frenzied commercialism of Christmas is self imposed. We all want to make sure we aren't the one who gives a less than stellar gift, etc. The idea of contributing is more and more appealing to me and I would like to some day just send a nice card to everyone telling them that my entire Christmas budget just went to (name one) charity or worthy cause, and that I made the gift in their name, and everyone else on my "christmas list." I'd feel better, maybe they would, maybe they wouldn't. But it would be a much better thing to do.

Like others have mentioned, I spend enough on myself (and my kids, during the year) that I do not need gifts, especially since I am probably better off than most of my relatives. I tell my 3 daughters to make me something or give me a photo of themselves or something like that. I'd rather just spend the day with them, have a nice dinner, go to a good movie together and just hang out than I would with the whole gift giving thing. The best thing is, that I think I raised my kids right and I think they would be all for that.

Next year I might just rent a big cabin, with plenty of room for my kids and their SO's, rent snowshoes and stock up on good food and just have fun in the snowy Rockies.

BTW, Happy Holidays to you all. May 2007 be full of great-- and safe-- rides.

It's not just the commercialism and pretense that I'm dreading. It's just been one of those years when you're a little short on "holiday cheer" and trying to muster it up for everyone else is going to take some effort this year.


But, since I started the thread, I'm going to just cut right back in and "un-rant" during my rant thread:

I was in line at a computer store today. It was relatively empty. No lines. I was paying with cash and the total was $35.27. So I gave the young man $35.00 and was digging around in my purse for the $.27 because I only had twenties left. No one was behind me in line, so it wasn't like I was holding up the show or anything. I only searched for a moment when all of a sudden the kid says, "Hey, don't worry about it. I've got you covered." And he reached in his pocket and pulled out the 27 cents. I told him, "You don't have to do that, I've got a Twenty." But, he just brushed it off and said it was no big deal to him. And of course, it probably wasn't. But it was a big deal to me. Not because I didn't have .27, but because you just don't meet many in simple retail that are that considerate - especially during the Christmas season and after a day full of irascible shoppers.

So, to the kid at the Best Buy near the railroad tracks across from James Coney Island on the north side of town - "Hey! Thanks. You just erased the memory of 20 bad clerks from my mind!"

Much Christmas madness is self-inflicted. We chose years ago to opt out and simplify. Brothers and sisters with families got subscribtions to National Geographic or something similar instead of buying for five ungrateful kids. Wifes's parents get a mail order Hickory Farms basket. My mother enjoys a gift certificate to the local steakhouse large enough for her to take all her retirement home friends out to eat!

My kids were taken care of without being spoiled and several charities get donations, which is usually the best part. (except Christmas morning when the kids were small! )

I just let the rest of the Christmas commercialization roll off me to no effect!

Enjoy the parts you enjoy and hang the rest of it!

A little off the topic but this idea came up on the BMW MOA forums... Karma gift giving.

A few of us with extra moto stuff put a thread up, those that reply put their name in the hat and the owner selects a winner out of that hat and the winner gets the karmic gift.

Check mine out at http://www.bmwmoa.org/forum/showthread. ... post167409

--Doug

Appropriate poster for this thread.